Life is full. Full of good things, hard things, in-between things, but full and always busy. And if you’re anything like me, it can sometimes feel like it’s all moving a little too fast. One minute you’re getting your day started in relative calm, the next you’re knee-deep in laundry, juggling WhatsApp groups, sick children, school lifts, work deadlines, and trying to answer the world’s most persistent question: what’s for dinner?
It’s beautiful, but it’s also busy, and if we’re not careful, life can start to run away from us. Some days we feel like we’re doing all the right things, ticking the boxes, but it feels like there is still something missing. That little something is the basics. The small things that ground us and keep us sane. The things that make life feel full in the right ways.
So, where do we turn for reminders on how to live better? How to get back to the basics? A life coach? A motivational podcast? A wellness check in with Chat GPT. Nope. Some of the best, most heartfelt, brutally honest advice on how to live well comes from a much smaller, messier source. And in my line of work, I am blessed to be surrounded by them. Toddlers!
Yes, toddlers, the tiny, chaotic truth-tellers of the world. Regularly covered in snot, wildly underqualified to operate cutlery, yet somehow totally secure in who they are. They do not doubt what they want, show no hesitation in asking for it, and absolutely no concern about what anyone thinks. Honestly, we could all learn a lot from them.
Lesson One: Confidence.
Have you ever watched a toddler walk into a room? That strut! That confidence! That absolute certainty that they are the main event. We could use a little of that. Imagine if we walked into boardrooms, weddings, Woolies, with the same energy as a two-year-old in a tutu and wellies. Not matching, not seasonal, but still fabulous. That toddler does not care what anyone else thinks, and honestly, why should we?
Lesson Two: Ask for What You Want. Loudly. Repeatedly.
Babies don’t beat around the bush. Hungry? They’ll let you know. Tired? You’ll hear about it. Want to listen to their favourite song again? Screaming is absolutely an option. Meanwhile, we’re over here saying, “If it’s not too much trouble, and if you happen to have time, and only if you were already going that way, could you maybe, possibly…?”
We all need to channel our inner toddler. Want a raise? Ask for it. Want your partner to help with laundry? Cry until they do (or maybe just have an honest conversation). Unhappy about how something has gone down at work? Let everyone know so it never happens again!
Lesson Three: Say No.
A toddler can say “NO” 37 times in one minute without blinking. “No” to broccoli. “No” to pants. “No” to bedtime. No to the blue cup, which, up until now, has been the only cup they will drink from. And you know what? They don’t feel guilty.
Meanwhile, we say yes to being baker-baker, again. Yes, to washing the soccer team jerseys, yet again. Yes, to extra projects at work, and yes to that socialite friend’s 3rd event of the month, even when we just want to stay home in our pyjamas and binge-watch our favourite series. Let’s reclaim the power of “no.” Politely, of course. But firmly. And maybe while holding a juice box and stamping your foot for emphasis.
Lesson Four: Fall Down, Get Up, Repeat.
Have you ever seen a toddler learning to walk? They fall on their face, giggle, and then do it again. Ten times. Twenty times. They don’t care who’s watching. They don’t care how many times it happens. They just get up. Again, and again.
We could use a bit more of that. Life knocks us down, and sometimes we act like we need a three-week sabbatical, spa day, or a support group. toddlers? They just need a nap, a cuddle, or maybe just a snack.
Lesson Five: Love Loudly.
Toddlers don’t play it cool. They don’t leave people blue-ticked and wait three days to text back. If they love you, they throw their arms around you, kiss your nose, or follow you to the toilet. It’s intense, it’s constant, but it’s pure.
We spend so much time hiding our feelings, guarding our hearts, waiting for the perfect moment. But maybe we should just say “I love you,” “I miss you,” or “You’re my favourite human” more often. If we are feeling something, we should be brave enough to say. No hesitation.
So, in summary, what can we learn from toddlers?
Be bold. Be honest. Say no. Get back up. And love like you mean it.
Also, don’t underestimate the power of a nap, a good cry, and, of course, snacks.
About the Author:
Joanne Teunissen is an advocate for vulnerable women and children and the director of the Durban North Baby Home, a place of safety for abandoned and vulnerable babies. With a deep belief in love, dignity, and second chances, Joanne and her team work to ensure that every child and every mother is seen, heard, and valued.
To support or learn more, visit www.babyhome.org.za
